Now that everyoneapos;s gone to see Spider-Man 3, and possibly have moved on to the buzz regarding Pirates of the Caribbean, it is now safe to watch Spider-Man 3 and be assured of no lines and no other people watching with you.
It is also now safe to not like it.
It was disappointing. I expected more. I wanted to like it, really, but... I wanted to like it but Emo Peter ruined it for me.
Starting with that alien stuff. That was just wrong. The writer of Ultimate Spider-Man knew the extra-terrestrial beginning of Venom was a long shot (or as Jon Stewart put it, "the radioactive spider and taking on its characteristics, I buy. But alien goo?"), although I guess you can only re-imagine so much for the movie.
And you have Topher Grace and Thomas Haden Church in the cast as your villains. Youapos;d expect more, right? But, no. Theyapos;re radically underused, and seem to only serve to advance the Peter storyline.
The story was coherent enough, and as usual we got the "with great power" lecture, but surely there wouldapos;ve been a better way to spend those 120 or so minutes.
Or maybe I just had high expectations. Because I loved Spidey 2, and what could go wrong with the prospect of a best friend showdown? Come on, Tobey Maguire vs. James Franco in an emo brawl? Those two are masters of the sensitive guy role (see Cider House Rules and the James Dean TV movie), and whatapos;s more fun than seeing James Franco sneer?
Oh, yeah. James Franco shirtless. Producers, did we really have to wait for three movies to get Harry to take off his clothes? And in the first ten minutes, too Sweet. Because emo James Franco doing his artistic bit is always, always a nice sight.
Yes, yes, friends and I have labeled black suit-wearing Peter Parker as Emo Peter Parker because, dammit, that hair I wouldapos;ve hoped there was a better way to illustrate the effects of the suit than Peter recreating Saturday Night Fever, but what the hell.
FYI, the friend with whom I watched Spidey 3, opined that Peter looked like Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy in the Dance, Dance video.
To me Emo Peter Parker bore a likeness of Emo Peter Petrelli from Heroes. (By the way, after Peter faced Sylar, the emo bangs are gone Go, Sylar)
Note to self: donapos;t name child a variant of Peter.
Spider-Man: You took off my mask?
Beast: We wanted to make sure you were still breathing.
Spider-Man [exasperated]: Man I am trying to keep a secret identity here No one respects my secret identity No one One secret Thatapos;s all I want. I want to put on the mask and keep it on And every time I turn around someone somewhere finds out Iapos;m Peter Parker
[The X-Men snigger.]
Shadowcat: We, uh, we didnapos;t know your name.
[Peter buries his head in his hands.]
and
You suck You suck You all suck Well, not you (pointing at Sam Raimi) because Evil Dead 2 was cool, but the rest of you suck
- Spidey to the cast and crew of Spider-Man 2
(from Ultimate Spider-Man comics)
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